Bang Theory by Lili Valente
Author:Lili Valente [Valente, Lili]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Self Taught Ninja
Published: 2019-11-03T18:30:00+00:00
Chapter Fifteen
Shep
Bridget paces in front of the picture windows in my summer sublet—renting a place instead of crashing at Bridget’s, and being forced daily into the path of temptation, was my summer gift to myself—scanning the street below like she’s looking for snipers.
“It’s fine,” I insist, setting her half of our to-go cupcake on the kitchen island and pulling out a stool. “Come. Sit. Eat your cupcake before it gets cold.”
“Cupcakes don’t get cold, and we should be at the police station.” She props a knee on the window seat and leans closer to the glass. “I bet you can see every inch of your apartment from the gazebo in the park. We should check after dark. And you should keep your blinds drawn when you’re home. Just in case.”
“I’m not going to live without sunlight because a fan has a crush on me.”
“She’s stalking you, Shep.” Bridget turns to pin me with a fretful look. “And it’s getting worse. This is what? The fourth or fifth note this month?”
“I’m not sure. The others were all typed. So this could have been someone else, a fan who just happened to be in the coffee shop at the same time we were and thought it would be nice to pay our bill.”
“And tell you to ditch me in creepy psychopath handwriting.”
“The handwriting was creepy,” I concede.
“So creepy.” Bridget shudders as she pulls her sweater tighter across her chest.
“If you’re cold, I can turn up the heat. Maybe make some more coffee?”
“I’m not cold. I’m worried.” She crosses the apartment’s small but cozy living room to lean against the island across from me. She doesn’t even look at her cupcake, a sure sign that she’s shaken by what happened this afternoon. Bridget appreciates dessert nearly as much as I do. “Does this happen a lot?” She threads her fingers into a fist on top of the counter. “Fans crossing the line?”
“Not to me, no.” I shrug. “But Colin and Cutter have both had issues with some over-the-top people. It’s mostly harmless stuff like sending weird presents to the venues or trying to sneak in backstage. But one girl broke into Cutter’s hotel room in Phoenix. He walked in and there she was, naked in his bed with a giant stuffed shark.”
Bridget cocks her head. “Because she’d heard he was obsessed with sharks?”
“And naked women.”
She huffs. It’s not quite a laugh, but it’s close enough to make me hope we’re on the verge of putting this behind us. “So what did he do? Call the police?”
I rub a hand across the back of my neck. “Well…from what I understand she was a very attractive woman.”
“A very attractive crazy woman,” Bridget says, her lips curving up on one side. “But then, Cutter’s not all there himself, is he?”
I grin. “No, he’s not. Though in his defense, it was a really nice stuffed shark, too. He had it hanging from the ceiling of the tour bus for a while.”
Bridget hums beneath her breath. “Right. So
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Dark Humor | Humorous |
Satire |
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